


A Broken Person Who Was So Much Like Me

by ArtsyGirl



Series: A Piece of Me [20]
Category: Enderal (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Daddy Issues, Family Issues, Gen, Terrible Jokes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-03
Updated: 2019-05-03
Packaged: 2020-02-16 20:49:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18698887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArtsyGirl/pseuds/ArtsyGirl
Summary: He looks me dead serious in the eyes “Tell me Susan what do you see in me that is worth saving? Why did you want me here with you when all I do is drag you down?”"At first i saw a broken person who was so much like me. A bit later I got to see a bit more about you and I came to like you. Mildly. And not in any romantic kind of way because when two people with daddy issues get together the outcome would be rather catastrophic. The fights would probably go something like this:  My dad was worse! No my dad was worse. Your dad is dead. SO is yours sort of…hopefully...”





	A Broken Person Who Was So Much Like Me

**Author's Note:**

> I warn you this is awful… terribly written angst, horrendous jokes and more…

  
Couldn’t sleep. Feeling too guilty, too worried. What if because of me giving him an ultimatum he does something there is no point of return from. No stop it! I can’t keep doing this to myself. I can’t keep torturing myself with what ifs. That is a slippery road to many ghastly things I’m not ready to deal with.  
  
I sit down on a bench near the noticeboard. The sun is not up yet but it is rising.  
  
Gods I just want to lay down for a bit. Perhaps I can squeeze in a nap while waiting for him. Maybe now I can get a little rest.  
  
I lie down on the bench and throw my hand over my eyes. Much better.  
  
At some point I can feel the sunlight- it is warm, soft urging me on to stay there on the bench resting. It can’t hurt to stay here for a while… Then the familiar soft orange color glowing through my eyelids goes away “Hey you are blocking the sun!”  
  
“You let your guard down.”  
  
I open my eyes and fee a familiar person standing over me frowning. I let out a breath I did not know I was holding and slump back on the bench. “Thari? I’m glad you could make it. And so that you know my guard was up.”  
  
“So if someone was out to get you…”  
  
I prop myself up on my elbows “I would have made a move…”  
  
He cuts in “a moment too late and you would have died.”  
  
“You don’t know that.”  
  
“I don’t and neither do you, thankfully. Seriously what would you do without me guarding your back?”  
  
I roll my eyes. I think I know that he means well, but for some reason I can’t hold my tongue and say bitterly “Sleep.”  
  
He takes his gaze off of me as if in guilt. I just realize the meaning behind what I said… shit. I sit up “Damn it TharaêI I did not mean it that way.”  
  
“No you did. I know that none of this has been easy on you. It hasn’t been smooth sailing for me either. Knowing what I know about myself and my past while dealing with the constant nightmares and having these emotions like venomous snakes inside me… there I go again - all about me. I’m so selfish. I don’t consider your feelings. I do what is just convenient for me. I know that I hurt you but what do I do? - I beat myself up about doing so and take no action to improve the situation. I swear it would be easier for you if I had jumped that day.”  
  
“Don’t you dare to talk like that about yourself!”  
  
“Or what? You’ll make me feel like an even greater burden? I should not have come. I should have taken the exit.” He slides off his hood with one smooth hand swipe revealing his outgrown hair. He looks me dead serious in the eyes “Tell me Susan what do you see in me that is worth saving? Why did you want me here with you when all I do is drag you down?”  
  
I reach or his hand to hold it but he flinches away. “During the time we plotted against the Father I saw a broken person who was so much like me. You seemed so determined to fix the wrongs that your ‘father’ caused and… and…” I sigh “And I looked up to you because you were there the proof that someone similar to me could stand up for their demons and I thought perhaps if you could do that then that means there might still be hope for me…”  
  
“So you…”  
  
“Shhh…I’m not done yet. In some ways you gave me hope, but then again you were a warning on what not to become. It sounds terrible now that I say it out loud but this was not the whole story. A bit later I got to see a bit more about you and I came to like you. Mildly and not in any romantic kind of way because…” I crack a wicked smirk “when two people with daddy issues get together the outcome would be rather catastrophic. The fights would probably go something like this: My dad was worse! No my dad was worse. Your dad is dead. SO is yours sort of…hopefully. Well yours has been dead longer. Yeah but does yours come to haunt you in dreams? Oh you are haunted by him only in dreams…you lucky bastard. That could be just one argument… blazes there would be so many of them. And could you imagine how awkward the sex would be… One of us would blurt out the word ‘daddy’ or ‘father’ while getting ho and heavy and then the other would nope their way out of the situation.”  
  
He pinches the bridge of his nose and slowly shakes his head from side to side “You are awful.”  
  
I grin widely “No beautiful and vulnerable show of emotions is safe from my horrid humor. Seriously can’t be all open about my feelings like that- I might blurt out all my deepest and darkest secrets in the streets where anyone could be listening. I am an esteemed Keeper and have an image to uphold.”  
  
“You know for a moment there I considered feeling sorry for you, but I’m already regretting it.”  
  
“That’s the Thari I know.” I stand up “Now what do you say shall we hit the road?”  
  
“Where are we off to?”  
  
I point to a paper with some instructions and a dreadful mugshot drawn on it with charcoal “Well the note on the notice board shows that we should be going after some wild mage called Bertulus the Ripper.”  
  
“Sounds doable.”  
  
“Exactly. What could go wrong?”  
  
“Don’t say that.”  
  
“Okay. No need to be all grumpy about that and begin to walk away from me.” I whistle to get his attention “Oh wait Thari.”  
  
He looks back to me over his shoulder “What is it now?”  
  
“Did I ever tell you that the leather armor you wear out adventuring is a great fashion choice.”  
  
“No.”  
  
“Well it is. It suits you and really brings out your ASSets. Damn daddy!” I bite my lip and wink at him.  
  
He just grunts disapprovingly.  


**Author's Note:**

> This was a bit different I think. I tried to convey a bit how messed up the Prophetess Susan really is. She is tired, so done with this *choose your curse word*, emotionally exhausted but despite al trying to stay strong and push through. Her world is a bit distorted the world and conversation jumps feels rushed and she does not think as much as she used to. Plus finding her deflection mechanism to serious things about herself with uncomfortable humor and rolling with it. There is def something going on with her.
> 
> This is a real thing from life that is rather awful. You are just talking to someone and finally getting serious when they flip the awkward ‘avoid the topic and getting serious with messed up humor switch’ and you are back to square one (or what it feels like square 0).
> 
> The both characters do have father figure issues tho and it would be curious to see how they would work those out.


End file.
